How To Attract Women Without Doing Anything

By Dave M.




Discuss 26

If you wanna learn how to attract women, there’s a secret that goes far beyond pickup lines, routines, NLP or anything remotely similar.

When you possess this secret, you’ll be able to walk into a room, any time you want… and have the most attractive women in the room approach YOU, wanting to hook up with you.

It’s the secret behind why actors or athletes can walk into a room, and within moments, seemingly have every single hot woman in the room is approaching them, flirting,  handing small papers with their phone number on it

… Very often, without even asking!

If you’ve never seen this happen with your own two eyes, you might think its nothing more than fantasy, but it does happen… only to a select few men.

I actually saw this happen one night at a posh club here in South Beach, Miami.  I’m standing next to the bar with a buddy of mine… we watch this go down, meanwhile, the actor was F’ed up on something (booze, blow or who the hell knows what), he could barely keep his eyes open…

And with the actor barely saying a word, woman after woman approached him… the only thing running through my mind was “HOLY FUCK! Theres gotta be something to this… he’s attracting women without doing ANYTHING!”

Then it hit me…

It all comes down to having a higher status than the women you wanna meet.  When you do this, you can attract women without really doing anything.

If you wanna learn how to attract women without really doing anything, you need to learn how to convey that you have a higher status than her. Thats the secret.



We all know how important eye contact is, its pretty much written in every single dating book on the market, but I’ve found that its also a great INDIRECT way of showing you have a higher status than a woman.

Remember: If she sees you as having a higher status, she will instantly be more attracted and interested in you.

When you’re speaking to her, or if she’s speaking to you, look at her eyes. Direct eye contact shows high status, lack of it, shows low status.

You can also look away at some points and not look back at her while she’s talking. This is a GREAT way to show indirectly that she isn’t interesting enough and you have a higher status.


Sit closer to her, talk louder, invade her space a bit, become what I call a “space invader”.

It’s a bit of an uncomfortable feeling but when you do it to a woman (within reason and at the right time) you give off this sense of ‘Hey, I’m totally comfortable with the situation and I’m in control here.’

Naturally, that conveys a sense of  higher status. She’ll become intrigued and you know from what I teach that one of my core ideas is this:

Mystery = intrigue, intirgue = interest


Never walk with your head down. It doesn’t matter how much of a dork you feel, or what happened in your day – always, always walk with your head up it conveys confidence and status. Remember you have something no other guy can give ANY other woman.



Arrange things so that your head is HIGHER than your partners. Stand when she sits, when she leans foward, you sit up straight. The subtle point here is that your head always seems to be higher than hers, so you must have a higher value than her.

Very subtle, but you are communicating on another level.


This is something I learned from a guy I worked with in my “boiler room” days. This guy had one of the worst stuttering problems you’ve ever seen in your life, but was consistently one of the top brokers in the company.

The secret? He’d keep people on the phone and they’d get stuck listening to him… He’d always start with UHHHH…. and keep doing that throughout the presentation to keep people glued to his words. (go figure)

Doing this literally compels her to listen to what you’re going to say but it essentially puts her on hold while you gather your thoughts.


In a nutshell? You become more confident.

Confidence is ESSENTIAL to conveying you have a higher status. You might have ZERO confidence with women, yet you might be a superstar at work. Use the confidence from that.

When you walk up to meet a woman, think of how great you are at work, that in and of itself should make you feel more confident.

Think about it…

You are a great guy, you make a good living and you’ve got a lot going for you, why should you feel less than a woman that works at the mall, flippin’ burgers, making $7.50 an hour?

Just because she looks good?


I’ll tell you a quick little story:

Back in the day, I used to have NO confidence with women. ZERO. I’d walk around all day with my head down. For real. I’d stare at the floor while I was walking down the street… and the worst part was I didn’t even realize I was doing it.

When my design work started doing well, I became more confident, not with women, but just overall. One night I walk into a party and I remember thinking to myself,  “I am the FUCKING MAN. I’m an amazing artist…  I’m awesome and I rule.”

Funny thing is, that It actually WORKED!

No shit.

I was so natural and I started talking to women at this party, which back then was completely out of my comfort zone, but because I had the confidence in my work I used it to carry over into my personal life.

When you’re confident, you’re relaxed and more like your natural self… you also send this ‘vibe’ out to others….

People feed off this vibe and you’ll be amazed at what you seem to attract.

When you’re confident and showing you’ve got a higher status, you don’t come off needy. And we all know that women see needy men as weak and pathetic.


It’s amazing when you’re confident… you tend to lean back, relax and let your real personality shine through. THIS is when you’re most like yourself, not the usual nervous needy guy… thats not you.

You’ve just been nervous around women so thats your brains ‘default’ program.

If you’ve read any of my material you probably get the sense that I don’t want you to become this “social robot”, where it’s all about a technique or ‘pickup line’, because when you chose that path, you’re relying on tricks and gimmicks, and as you’ve probably imagined… it’s so much deeper than that.


When you’ve conveyed a higher status, being more confident and acting like yourself,  the result is you’re becoming a natural. THIS is the place you wanna be.

When you’ve reached this place, you’re out having fun and not thinking about how to attract women or how to pick women up, you’re not wondering what you should or shouldn’t say. None of that matters. You just act.

And that’s when your success skyrockets. It’s magic.

When you try too hard (like you might be doing now) you show that you have a lower status than the woman you’re with. You show her either direcctly or indirectly that you are needy and you’re hiding something from her.

So the point is, Don’t try too hard. Lean back and relax.


When you have a high status, you realize that your time is important and you start to value your time. So if you’re out with a woman you met using  Insider Internet Dating, and its not going where you want, or you’re just not interested, you have absolutely no hesitations about ending it.

Remember, if you don’t place a value on your time than no other woman will.

You need to show you’re busy. On the phone (by not talking for a long time 10-15 min max), by not being so available to see her 5 times a week and finally by not seeing her on the weekends until she’s EARNED that time with you.


What I mean by this is you start to know ‘whats really going on’.

It’s like when NEO saw the matrix. He could see what was REALLY happening, he had clarity. When you start to see when a woman is trying hard to impress you or when women give each other that look, you just nod your head cuz you get it.

When you’ve got this part down, it’s easy to talk to a girl and bust on her for not following up with the flirting. This is letting her subtly know that you know what’s up. You get it.

And it’s a VERY attractive quality women love.


I need to thank David D. for bringing us this technique. I love it personally. Think about this for a second: You are busting on a woman, teasing her in a playful, fun NOT angry way where most guys would be petrified to do that. By you doing this you show you have a higher status than her.

You can call her cute, brat. punk.

The point is, by you NOT kissing up to her, by not being like most of the other guys you are showing her that you must have a higher status than her. I mean why else would you bust on some hot girl, you MUST have a higher status.


When you have a high status, women start wanting you more. Not only that, other girls see this and THEY’LL start to want you as well. In otherwards you’re like a target for women (in a good way). They seem to have a “radar lock” on you and you’ve got no idea why. I mean you do, but you’re shaking your head thinking wow, this actually DOES work.

Question is why?

Remember back when you were a kid in school?

Remember when you had no girls? You couldn’t get a date to save your life, but when you DID have a girlfriend, it seemed like EVERY girl in school had a crush on you and you find this out when you have a girlfriend. (doh!)

Remember that?

Why did all of these women have a crush on you all of a sudden? It’s because when you had the girl you became a guy who had a higher status!

Funny isn’t it? When you convey you have a higher value, women will go out and take all kinds of risks, risking loosing her value to get your approval.

They pursue you!

Oh, and looks have absolutely NOTHING to do with this.

The higher value you show, the more women want you and the more women will want you to recognize them and be with them. They’ll try to get you hooked into a relationship before you’re even ready (Don’t let this happen)

Women will try to impress you with things, they will try to qualify themselves to you (start to pay attention to this in your regular life as well)

I guess my point is, once you’ve conveyed a higher status, OTHER people will try hard to gain your interest.

You become the pursued NOT the pursuer.

And when you’re able to use the power of leverage to meet and date a lot of women you get REALLY good at this sort of stuff VERY fast.


Lets say in order for you to really ‘get’ this, its gonna take you going out with 10 different women. Could be more, could be less, but lets just go with 10.

How long would it take you to get 10 dates the way you’re doing it now?

You’d probably have to get AT LEAST 20 numbers to get 10 dates from a bar/club because we ALL know how flaky those women are. 🙂

If you got 1 number a night, 2 nights a week, thats 2 numbers a week.

2 numbers a week divided by 20 = 10 weekends.

Have you gotten 2 numbers a weekend… for 10 weekends straight?

(I know I haven’t.)

Are you WILLING to do what it takes to get 20 numbers in a bar/club?

I didn’t think so.

Let me show you a MUCH easier way.

You send out say 100 emails over a period of 2-3 weeks, spending about 2 minutes per email.

You get 30 numbers.

You set up 20 dates and by the time you’re 1/2 way done with those 20 dates, you “get it”.

The best part? Because you have so many dates lined up, you don’t care about the outcome of any one. You start to apply these subtle concepts to use and your results keep getting better.

Plus you don’t need to go out to a bar/club and have that PRESSURE of having to attract women that night because you already know you have 20 dates lined up.

Do you think you’d have a different mindset then?

I hope you got a ton of value from this. I’d like to know what you thought of this blog post . let me know in the comment box below.

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26 Comments to How To Attract Women Without Doing Anything

  1. great stuff dave

    Comment by matthew — @ 8:07 AM

  2. Absolutely 100% bang on…..thanks for reminding me of these fundamentals….

    Comment by Terry — @ 8:45 AM

  3. Dave
    Your soooo … right!
    Sitting home with a few minutes at the computer more than equals hours and mucho money chasing ladies in a bar or club.
    The internet is the most amazing device ever created in the history of mankind to find, sort out, meet and mate women .. PERIOD.

    Comment by Haywood — @ 9:14 AM

  4. WAOOH !!!I think this is cool thumbs up bro good work i have a problem with espressing my feellings to the girl i really love pls i want you to help me on where to start and how i will do it because i dont really know how i feel if i tell her she will get mad at me and never talk to me again.

    Comment by Anthony — @ 11:01 AM

  5. Great Read, truth.

    Much Props & Respect


    Comment by Waggy Baby — @ 11:45 AM

  6. The “5 Things” that convey a high status are spot on. Let me start off saying I don’t have playboy looks, I’m going bald and I’m as skinny as a rail. I used to walk around slouched over looking down. I learned on my own to stand or walk errect with my eyes forward (not looking down). Girls actually start conversations with me before I even notice them. I guess they see me as having high status because of my apparent confidence. Keep writing your blog posts. Everyone can learn something from them.

    Comment by Jim — @ 1:15 PM

  7. Dave,

    Your ideas about value are a bullseye and should be practiced by every guy who thinks he may be second best, with the women and in life. It’s like the difference between
    wearing a brown suit and wearing a black. They are still suits but the black suit carries the higher value just by its looks!
    Great blog, Dave

    Comment by Doctari — @ 3:08 PM

  8. Actley thats cool..Even at work they say hi to me!.Then i said hi back or bye.I read your blog posts.

    Cool stuff man

    Comment by Jack — @ 3:17 PM

  9. Excellent advice.

    Comment by We Be Jammin — @ 4:45 PM

  10. Dave,
    Great stuff as usual. When is IID going to be availible again?

    Comment by Brad — @ 5:17 PM

  11. Dave,

    Good article — please continue doing these. Point #5 doesn’t seem to make sense, but I’ve never tried it. Thanks for writing.

    Comment by Cary — @ 6:21 PM

  12. I’m a smart fun tall good-looking guy, young and appealing for my 4o+ years, yet have been wasting DECADES of my time feeling inferior, unworthy and ‘ineligible’ to great friends, business people & ESPECIALLY to women.

    You know, like the pretty 20-something at the cafe with the great ass and warm pretty smile. It ALL felt impossible to me to have, as if everything I wanted was trapped behind glass.

    I tell you – you don’t have to be like this. NO issue in your present life or your shattering childhood can ‘make’ you unworthy.

    Those women & associates & friends were always right there just WAITING for me to validate MYSELF (not vice-versa) – and know what happens? They immediately open up, are warm, are at least accepting. Women actually LIKE me.

    It’s like a miracle. Try it. Try Dave M’s thing. Try ANYthing – just start now! Stop denying your life & instead say “I affirm life in spite of everything.”

    Comment by Jake — @ 7:20 AM

  13. Excellent info. Thank you so much for publishing it…

    Comment by Ben — @ 9:55 AM

  14. great brush up on many basics of the proper attitude Dave… kudos! this alone should help lots of guys get on a better path.

    Comment by TD — @ 3:03 PM

  15. Great stuff Dave! Thanks for keeping it simple…

    Comment by Tom — @ 5:39 PM

  16. thanks. trying to get you guys thinking a lil bit…

    there’s a reason why everyone can use the same material and some guys go back to the forums whining and complaining how it ‘didn’t’ work…

    but everyone else is gettin results except for a small minority.

    mindset. you gotta get this right for anything to work.

    Comment by Dave M. — @ 9:20 PM

  17. Yeah, I got your point, and I’m doing this just before I’ve read this article, though I still have some questions, what should I exactly say to show that I’m higher than any of them, words matters for me, cause when I do say things (and when it’s something that I rock) they try to say some sort of things that…. probably it’s something we call bluff, I do qualify women, not the other way around, but not all of them are the same. I got these girls to talk with (yeah, I’m limiting myself, cause I was really busy in my work) but there is one that really bothers me (a girl) a woman that tries to do the same thing, the higher status thing that you’re saying, and I can’t get declare that I’m tougher than her without offending her, how can I do the hell thing without offending her?

    Comment by Poisydon — @ 3:06 PM

  18. rosy high status…when his head is higher than hers in the boardroom…and she knows hers…and shut her big mouth…and get0the rosy song that is rosy awesome… to bring us a date is just an outcome of the social natural vibes, that simply grow to flow.,and when u get a rosy blow….dont have dir ty mind,bj?.,if u think.,on the other hand.,the blow 2 every flow that blows.,the rosy juices flowing.,and when u feel it oozing and snöozing…in ur pores and gores…like the tention and attentiön.2 rosy disattention evolution neo.,where did u get neo here.,dumped his intuitive imagination…with real data to his experience…and he was new neo…..a rosy neo..aha new.,2 dew.,so few…,rosy angelic subleties,and theradiant fl melodies and harmonics..

    Comment by mike — @ 8:06 AM

  19. Great Information very easy to apply.

    Comment by Robert — @ 5:01 AM

  20. This article was so good I read the whole thing and I hate to read! Very entertaining and cool to learn how to gain higher status.

    Comment by James Z — @ 11:23 AM

  21. body language keeping your head hight is really important it lead me to dating the most incredible girl ever. Honestly its really weird that when your dating a hot girl it seems loads of women are trying to hit on you its the most weird thing ever 3 times girls with boyfriends standing right next to them would give me huge beaming smiles its soooo weird but now that iam single all that is gone wdf.

    Comment by Psymon — @ 9:01 AM

  22. This stuff is right on Dave. Women love and hate men who value their time who have lives outside of them. But they sleep with us.

    Comment by Gregory B — @ 7:58 PM

  23. Thank you DAVE. I just recently got layed off my training since I did not work up the companies expectations. Thus, lately i beeen feeling incompetent and low. But after this article, i felt just a bit better-much better. Dont get me wrong-im not a depressed cunt ahahahahaha Im a very strong man. Thanks Dave-keep it up and you will amount to amazing things.

    Comment by Anonymous — @ 6:29 PM

  24. How to attract women without doing anything Internet Dating…

    When you possess this secret, you’ll be able to walk into a room, any time you want… and have the most attractive women in the room approach YOU, wanting to hook up with you….

    Trackback by — @ 9:10 PM

  25. I’ve gone back to school (because I’m currently unemployed) to get some training and a certification in communications and cabling. Around Thanksgiving, last year, I had a mental breathrough and decided I was going to stop Caring what other people thought and start living for ME. Since then my confidence has gone through the roof and other people have started to respect me alot more. At school, the guys are intimidated by my confidence and the women get really quiet when i pass by them in the hallway. I can feel all eyes are on me, lol! I will agree completely, with you, Dave. Your tips work well and they work quickly. I have a question for you about something I overheard a woman say today. I was headed to class and passed by a group of women. They got really quiet as I passed by them, and as usual I made no eye contact with any of them. As I walked passed, I heard one woman rather quietly say to another woman, “I’ll bet he’s married.” What did she mean by that? Help me out Dave.

    Andrew A.

    Comment by Andrew A. — @ 10:15 PM

  26. Ok, where can I learn more about setting up my profile. I’m just starting off on this site. Can someone tell me what’s to go?

    Comment by Jake D — @ 9:34 AM

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